Saturday, June 25, 2016

HULKGAMECRIT PODCAST: KILLING EMOTIONAL CRABS EDITION!

BRANDON KINDA LIKED E3
MATHIAS WANTS TO MAKE AMERICA GRATE AGAIN
HULK FEEL SORRY FOR SEA SPIDERS




DISCUSSION POINTS:

E3
UBISOFT AND EA KILLED A LOT OF LATINOS
CRAB MURDER
GOD OF WAR THE CNIMATIC DOPENESS
THAT WAS ACTUALLY A COD TRAILER?
ALL THE GAMES THAT ARE COMING OUT
ODIN SPHERE DISCUSSION
MATHIAS STILL PLAYING POE



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Friday, June 17, 2016

HULKGAMECRIT PODCAST! ORB OF REGRET EDITION!

TIS THE MOST WONDERFUL WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR~
TOO MANY GAMES AND TOO LITTLE TIME





DISCUSSION POINTS:
MIRRORS EDGE PREQUEL IS EITHER GREAT OR TERRIBLE..
ROCKET LEAGUE "JAPANESE MAN"
WITCHER
EVE WAR CORRESPONDENTS
EVE WAR PROFITEERS
EVE MERCHANTS OF DEATH
HULKGAMECRIT DISCOUNT WEAPONS EMPORIUM tm
EVE MERCENARIES HAD A REALLY GREAT YEAR
EVE PROPAGANDA?
SPACE GAME OF THRONES
NEW GAMES THAT LOOK LIKE BOMB DIFFUSION
NEW CONTROLLERS
AFK DICKERY CAUSED BUG


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Friday, June 10, 2016

HULKGAMECRIT PODCAST! E3 DISCORD EDITION

BRANDON IS ON THE SEAS
MATHIAS WANTS HIS WAFFLE BONES
DAVID HAS IT RUFF
HULK DOESN'T WANT TO RETRAIN THEM





DISCUSSION POINTS:
STEAM
BRANDON NOT LISTENING
SIMULAR
SO MANY NOT FUCKS WERE GIVEN THAT DAY
FRENCH HOSTILE TAKE OVERS
HILL HE CHOSE TO DIE ON
DISCORD CANT HANDLE A 4 WAY ( INSERT TERRIBLE INNUENDO HERE)
NEW GRAPHICS CARD FOR VR
OVERWATCH
TERRIBLE FANFIC


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Friday, June 3, 2016

HULKGAMECRIT PODCAST: ASMR EDITION!

REMEMBER THE GOOD OLE DAYS WHERE EVERYTHING WAS LOUD, IMPERSONAL, AND NOT FULL OF LAYOFFS? THAT AIN'T THIS WEEK'S EPISODE...






DISCUSSION POINTS: 
CHOCOLATE NO JUTSU! 
LAYOFFS
VALKYRIA FAILS
DOPE SEGWAYS
MORE DIVISION FUCK UPS
FINAL FANTASY FOOD PORN


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BRANDON'S LATEST RAMBLINGS

 

Tuesday, May 31, 2016

WHEN LIONS EAT SUNS


(VLR SPOILERS BELOW)

AS MANY FOLLOWERS PROBABLY ARE ALREADY AWARE, THE ENDING OF THE ZERO ESCAPE SERIES IS LESS THAN A MONTH AWAY...

A SERIES HULK WAS MADE AWARE OF DUE TO CONTRACT THAT SADLY STUTTERED TO HALT AND MUCH LIKE HULK'S CONTRACT THE SERIES ITSELF IN RECENT YEARS HAS ALSO HAD ITS OWN SHARE OF DIFFICULTIES.

YET NONE OF THAT REALLY MATTERS RIGHT NOW HULK GUESS

CURRENTLY, HULK HAS BEEN REPLAYING VIRTUES LAST REWARD PARTLY TO DUST OFF THE COBWEBS  / REMIND HULK HOW THESE GAME ARE SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYED AND THE OTHER REASON BEING BECAUSE OF SOMETHING HULK MENTIONED IN PODCAST A LITTLE WHILE BACK.


THIS WAS ONE OF THOSE GAMES WHERE IT WAS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE THROUGH EITHER ONES OWN HULKY CLEVERNESS ( AND POSSIBLY SHEER STUPIDITY) THAT SOMEONE CAN FIND THEMSELVES SKIPPING AN ENORMOUS SECTION OF THE GAME'S STORYLINE THUS ENDING UP IN SPOILER TERRITORY OF THE WORSE NATURE.... AND WITHOUT GAMEFAQS TO BLAME

A THOUSAND HULK TEARS WERE SHED

AS BRANDON MENTIONED ON PODCAST, THE IDEA OF DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS AND THE DEVELOPER HAVING ENOUGH FORESIGHT TO EMBRACE AND ENACT ON THOSE DESIRES BEFORE A PLAYER EVEN TOUCHES THE GAME CAN BE SEEN AS A DEFINING MOMENT FOR THE GAME, FOR THE DEVELOPER, FOR EVERYONE IN GENERAL.

AND HULK TENDS TO AGREE WITH ADORABLE MINION, THE IDEA OF A DEVELOPER PREDICTING AND ENACTING SUCH LEVELS OF ACTION WITHIN THEIR PLAYERS IS AN EXCITING AND VERY RARELY EXPLORED TUNNEL OF NARRATIVE DEVELOPMENT.


IN THE CASE OF VIRTUES LAST REWARD, HULK HAD ACCIDENTALLY ENTERED SPOILER TOWN DUE TO A COMPUTER TERMINAL HULK FOUND VERY EARLY IN THE GAME AND THROUGH THE GAMES FASCINATING NARRATIVE STRUCTURE, HULK DECIDED TO RETURN BACK TO THE TERMINAL ONCE A FEW DIFFERENT " CONCEPTS" HAD POPPED INTO HULK MIND WHICH TURNED OUT TO THE BE MULTIPLE USERNAMES AND PASSWORDS NEEDED ( HULK HAD NO IDEA AT THE TIME). HULK WILL TALK NARRATIVE PLOT LINE STRUCTURE ON ANOTHER DAY BUT HULK WOULD LIKE TO STRESS A COUPLE THINGS BEFORE MOVING FORWARD.

THE "SPOILER TOWN" HULK HAD ENTERED SHOULD HAVE BEEN SOMETHING HULK SHOULD SEE VERY VERY LATE IN GAME. HULK'S NARRATIVE STRUCTURE FOR VLR WAS FOREVER RUINED BY THE FUCK UP BUT IF HULK HAD TO GUESS IT WAS ALL THINGS MEANT TO BE LEARNED AS HULK REACHED PERHAPS THE 80% CLEARANCE MARK INSIDE THE GAME. WHEREAS HULK FIGURED OUT ENOUGH OF THE TERMINAL WHEN HULK WAS NEAR 30% COMPLETION RATE.



NEEDLESS TO SAY, THE EUPHORIC AND BATSHIT PERSPECTIVE BASED INSANITY OF 999 WAS INSIDE VLR BUT THE SPOILERS HULK HAD ACCIDENTALLY UNLOCKED INSIDE THE GAME MADE IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HULK TO CARRY THE SAME KIND OF EMOTIONAL RESPONSE HULK HAS CARRIED FOR MOST OF THE VN'S THAT HAVE BEEN WRITTEN BY THIS DEVELOPER.

AND THEREIN LIES THE DANGEROUS AND EXCITING ASPECT OF VLR. THE GAME COULD HAVE BEEN BORING AND PLACED CHECKS INSIDE THE CODE THAT REFUSED THE PLAYER TO MOVE ON WITH THIS PARTICULAR STORY UNTIL ALL CONDITIONS HAD BEEN MET.

YET THEY DECIDED NOT TO GO THE TRADITIONAL ROUTE INSTEAD BANKING ON A "GAMER'S" "INTELLIGENCE" WHICH IN HULK'S CASE DID NOT GO AS PLANNED.

AS HULK ENTERS INTO ZERO TIME DILEMMA HULK CANT DECIDE IF HULK SHOULD LOVE OR HATE WHAT VLR ASPIRED TO DO AND THIS FRUSTRATES HULK. IF THEY HAD GONE THE BORING ROUTE AND PLACED BLOCKS IN THE WAY, IT WAS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE HULK WOULD HAVE NEVER FIGURED THAT OUT AND GAVE UP ON THE GAME HALF WAY! ( HULK IS SILLY LIKE THAT) THEN BLAMBASTEDLY SMASHED THEM ON TWITTER WHILE BEING A POUTY HULK! 

 YET IN THE DIRECTION THAT THEY WENT HULK HAD PROGRESSED DECENTLY BUT FIGURED STUFF OUT BEFORE THE DEVELOPER INTENDED AND LO HULK FELT CHEATED WITH HULK'S EXPERIENCE.

SHOULD HULK HAVE BEEN BLOCKED? SHOULD HAVE THE DEVELOPER NOT PLACED ALL THE SPOILERS RIGHT AFTER THE TERMINAL PUZZLE WAS SOLVED? PERHAPS SOME SORT OF RECAP SYSTEM BASED ON THE STORYLINES HULK HAD UNLOCKED SHOULD HAVE OCCURED AT THE TERMINAL THEN ALL THE EXTRA STORYLINES STUFF SHOULD HAVE BEEN SPRINKLED IN AFTER THAT WAS DONE? (IS THAT AN EVEN PLAUSIBLE CONCEPT FOR THE CURRENT GAMEDEVING SYSTEMS?)

THERE'S SO MANY DIFFERENT WILD WAYS A STORY COULD HAVE BEEN TOLD IN THIS GAME YET THE DEVELOPER FELT THEIR CHOICE WAS THE BEST CHOICE....

AND NOW HULK SITS HERE IN THE DARKNESS PONDERING IF ZERO TIME DILEMMA WILL BE THE GLUE TO MAKE THIS SERIES SHINE MORE IN HULK MIND OR IF THE ONE FUCKUP ON WHAT HAS BEEN AN ABSOLUTELY STELLAR AND CRAFTY SERIES WILL BE THE ONLY ELEMENT THAT SHALL LAST AS THE CURTAIN IS CLOSED.

ONE SINGULAR MOMENT IN ALL OF SPACE TIME THAT WAS THE MOMENT HULK NEEDED. YET LIKE VLR AND 999 HULK APPEARS TO BE ON ONE OF THE SIDE PATHS.

AND THE MORE "PROVOCATIVE" CHARACTERS ARE PROBABLY DEAD IN AN INFIRMARY SOMEWHERE NEARBY WHILE A BRITISH CIRCUS LOOKING MANIAC IS DROPPING BOMBS AROUND.